I was working with a client recently who asked me to channel the soul perspective of an ex-friend. She had recently experienced a break-up of their friendship and wanted to know what had happened to cause the rift between them.
During the message, her friend’s soul alluded to the judgments that they each held towards each other. She spoke of the animosity and tension that is created when support is withdrawn in order to hold judgment towards another. It was clear from her message that they both had unmet expectations and discomfort that culminated in the ending of the friendship. Her friend also indicated that their commitment to one another had completed.
As we processed the message together, a couple important points came up:
1. Some friendships are not meant to be lifelong. We live in a society in which the success of certain relationships (marriages, partnerships, friendships) is determined by their longevity. This is a very limited way of determining success. What if many of us are meant to have a variety of friendships and partnerships as part of a rich human journey? What if different souls are in our lives to serve specific purposes and after the purpose is served, we change or end the connection without blame, guilt, or judgment? What if we blessed the journey of the soul(s) who served us so well in our growth, instead of holding on to judgment and disappointment? How freeing would that be?
2. When we do go through a change of relationship, whether it is a change of status or an end to the connection, it can be very healing and revealing to highlight the gifts and wisdom that were experienced within the journey. I suggested to my client that she write a thank-you note to her ex-friend to appreciate the ways the friendship served her. The process of writing the note is where the healing resides. When we are seeking ways to heal our broken hearts, wounds, and/or bruised egos, appreciation and gratitude goes a very long way. It’s the most effective way I know to clear out the heavy energy of disappointment and blame and replace it with the replenishing energy of appreciation.
What do you think? Are there any people in your life that remain corded to you through negative memories/energy? If you were to write them a note of appreciation, how might that look and feel to you? Even if you don’t mail it, the healing is likely to benefit all involved.